Saturday, October 9, 2010


Maybe the title miscalculation seems a little pessimistic, but that's not what I'm about.  Actually, I usually try to look at the glass as half full.  Ironic enough right now I'm feeling somewhat pessimistic.  I think it just happens to be one of "those" days.  I know that everyone knows what I'm talking about because we all have them.  Telling myself that I'm going to be productive today and at 8 p.m. realizing that what I accomplished today was equivalent to about nothing! Getting home from the grocery store only to realize that I left my phone at the checkout counter. Worse, hoping that I didn't leave the volume on so that the workers could hear my ring tone and judge me for it as I meekly asked if they found a phone. 

It is quite possible that it is just me, but I hate it when I think about the fun things that I want to do the following day, and when I speak to my boyfriend about it, I find out that the things that I wanted to do aren't going to happen because he has to do homework.  What a bummer! The weather is supposed to be perfect, just like today, and we couldn't hang out today so I figured that tomorrow would be a great day... but my dreams are shot down because of homework!  I sound like a giant jerk. It's not the homework that upset me, it was really me thinking of the fun day that we could have had and being let down by reality.  I hate taking my disappointment out on someone else, but it's what I end up doing even against my better judgment. Now I'm sitting here typing this while the person I am upset with is on the phone, and neither one of us has said anything for the duration of this post, because I can't just let go of this stupid feeling inside called selfishness.  My feelings are hurt because yet again I am left to do nothing and try to entertain myself.  Is it sad that I feel like my life can be expressed through emoticons, and that they for the most part they can sum up how I feel?


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